On the 9-Year-Old Boarding a Plane Without Ticket

Stories such as this one currently making the rounds come out every couple years so. Some minor somewhere sneaks onto a plane without a ticket, unaccompanied. In 2007 it was this case of another incredibly clever 9-year-old boy making it through TSA security in Seattle. I’m pretty sure there have been others from 2007 up to the current case, but I can’t recall them right now off the top of my head. Google research could bring them to light, if you’re so inclined. The point is, this isn’t the first time it’s happened.

TSA Agent Caught Smuggling Illegal Immigrants Into the U.S.

A lot of bad TSA apples getting arrested this week for things that are embarrassingly and diametrically opposed to the whole homeland security deal. Awkward.

From the story:

“David Alexander Diaz-Torres was arrested in Orlando, Florida on Friday for participating in a scheme with five others to smuggle a group of Brazilian nationals into the United States. Specifically, Diaz-Torres, a TSA agent, allowed the cadre of Brazilians through a security checkpoint at Luis Munoz Marin International Airport in San Juan, Puerto Rico on March 24 of last year without questioning. The group then reportedly flew to New York, Boston, and Philadelphia on commercial flights.”

No worries, guys. The TSA Policy and Statement Generator has this one covered. 8 clicks in and I got this by typing in “Brazilians”:

“TSA has developed a risk-based deployment methodology that it continues to evaluate and modify, as needed. The recent news story of a TSA officer attempting to smuggle his illegal Brazilians through security in no way reflects upon that methodology.”

The TSA Should Thank Me for Being a Reasonable Pain-in-the-Ass Former TSA Screener/Blogger…

…Because this other former TSA screener’s website is a real piece of work. I just spent 30 minutes clicking through this guy’s site– 30 minutes of my life I’ll never get back. Besides a complete lack of humor or anything that can even compete with the Insider’s TSA Dictionary by way of awesomeness, the former TSA screener behind the TSA Cover Up Scandal and the ensuing bomb threats has a website that is just chock-full of high octane crazy. Click here to check it out: satanhasfallen.org.

If anyone needs proof that Christianity has more than its share of crazy people with god-awful rant-laced websites, look no further. Most of the site is just a red cross, the one you see in the below picture (along with the guy who got hit by the crazy train).

There are several tabs on the site, titled “End of the World,” “End of Satan,” “Divided Spirit-Letter to the World”  and “Photo.” But almost all of them lead to nothing besides that photo of the red cross (this guy really fucking loves his red cross), along with a huge block of scripture ordering us all to repent, for the end is near.

But then, if you follow the recommendation to “click on the cross to read the letter,” you are treated to 15-pages of pure, former-TSA insanity.

The highlights, for me:

-The point at which Onuoha calls Hilary Clinton “Satan’s daughter.”

-The point at which Onuoha delves into further instructions on how Frauenfelder’s daughter should dress, including an anachronistic reference to Madonna that makes me think that Onuoha is literally living in 1984:

“If you need an example on how to properly dress your fifteen year old daughter before you send her out on a world tour in this world ruled by satan, you should look up to Muslim women, learn how to dress your daughter like them, and not like Madonna and those like her who lack good morals; those that satan are using to corrupt the young and the innocent.”

-The point at which Onuoha addresses all LAX passengers:

“To LAX passengers, you are in good Hands; you are all in the good Hands of our Lord our God our Creator Jesus Christ. I am not a person of terror. I do not work for satan, or his people. The evil one has nothing in me. You missing your flights should be the last thing on your minds at this time.”

Don’t worry, LAX passengers, you don’t even need the TSA for security; He’s got you covered.

-The point at which Onuoha addresses Al Qaeda:

“To Al Qaeda and all the terror groups in the whole world, I have seen and know your god that you kill for, and he is not the LIVING GOD Who is our LORD our GOD JESUS CHRIST. Your god is satan, and in the days ahead, our GOD; the only LIVING GOD Who owns your life and breath will bring down His Wrath upon you all and your god, and I will be there on Judgment Day to bear witness against you and those who ignored this warning.”

Go Christian-God-craziness, it’s your birthday, go Christian-God-craziness, it’s your birthday!

I have a strange feeling that Onuoha’s defense attorney is going to go for an insanity-type defense.

((EDIT: In the time I spent researching this guy’s shitty-ass website, I noticed a publishing company’s name in one of Onuoha’s 96 photos, “Dog Ear Publishing.” I Googled that and Onuoha’s name, and discovered that one can order a 424-page book written by Onuoha: http://www.superbookshop.net/index.php?page=book&ean=9781457521492

I’ll leave this here in case Onuoha gets out of jail in a couple years and really does do something tragic. I would hope the FBI noticed that tiny detail in the picture, or found the book in his apartment (only because Onuoha’s phone threats and package-sending was a little outside the realm of the 1st Amendment– otherwise, I believe the guy’s a harmless nut), though the NSA probably watched me pull it up in my browser, anyway.))

Ladies and gentlemen, at long last, we get a peek into the mind of the former TSA screener who told Mark Frauenfelder’s daughter to cover up. I give you the full text of the craziness that is. . .

The End of America

The End of the World

The End of satan

Rejoice! Our GOD JESUS CHRIST CONQUERED

To Whom It May Concern,

If I have offended you from what you heard that I said to your daughter, my offense to you and those who support you should be the least of your worries. Regarding the incident that your daughter claimed occurred, I will never apologize to you or to whomever it may concern, but you should apologize to parents, specifically to those women who have high morals and know how to present their bodies in the only way that is acceptable to the eyes of the One. If you need an example on how to properly dress your fifteen year old daughter before you send her out on a world tour in this world ruled by satan, you should look up to Muslim women, learn how to dress your daughter like them, and not like Madonna and those like her who lack good morals; those that satan are using to corrupt the young and the innocent.

For years, this nation, America, satan and his people in the world has persecuted Him who sent me to deliver His warning to America and the whole world. For years, America, satan and his people in the world has persecuted the people of Him who sent me, many they have killed, many they will continue to kill, and they will continue to justify this evil as freedom. On the day that I release the message from the Ruler who sent me to the whole world, any soul, any nation of satan’s that fails to obey the instructions from the Ruler who sent me will be turned into hell, even the once mighty American government that gloats with arrogance will be reduced to nothing just like the nothing that she is.

Do not expect another 9/11. What will unfold on this day and on the days ahead will be greater than 9/11; the day that America, satan, and their allies come together to celebrate and revere.

The incident that occurred on that day that satan chose was orchestrated by satan, satan confessed to me that he was behind the incident on that day that your daughter was led to me; the evil one pushed me to reveal myself to the world before the appointed time. No parents with common sense will say that they do not care about how their fifteen year old baby daughter dresses, unless satan blinded their eyes and darkened their hearts to forget what kind of world we live in, and what kind of days that we are now living in. Do you not read? Do you not watch the news?

I read that you or whoever that was related to you wrote that satan’s daughter, hillary clinton, stated that America has to lead in stopping people like me. With all your super-intelligence, diviners and babblers, stargazers and astronauts, how did your government fail to detect me? How did satan’s government fail to tell his son in that Whitehouse that that day is here? Could it be because there’s a Higher Power greater than all the power in the world? The Power who controls Heaven,and earth, and the seas. America was given the chance to lead. America failed! satan owns America, satan runs America. America has filled its belly with destructive wine, and her final days are numbered. America is nothing but a great Harlot that corrupts the innocent, with satan on her side, America blinds the eyes of many, and further darkens the hearts of those whose hearts are already darkened. Do not be quick to call me foolish. Yes, in your world, I know that I’m foolish, but my foolishness is great wisdom compared to the foolishness that comes from satan, and satan’s allies. If any leader in satan’s world today has my foolishness in their head as their wisdom, the world would’ve been a better place today. On one of the days of the Ruler who sent me, I will turn America’s wisdom into foolishness, for wisdom only belongs to the Ruler who sent me, the One who lives forevermore, and is ready to appear with His mighty Army from this Country that is near us, and will destroy satan and his allies in the world.

I read that in your blog or whatever satan calls it, that you took some time to describe me, using some words that I find funny, and not offensive at all. Words like “creepy,” “Taliban-y.” If these are the best words in your American dictionary, I hate to use this opportunity to remind you that you and the media have some homework to do. I am who I am, and I am proud to be who I am. I love the Way, and the Way is the only Way, and by His amazing grace, I will never change. On the day that you receive my message, I will need you to apologize to your daughter, tell her how much you love her, and lastly if you are willing, you should gather your family and friends, lift up your heads above, and you will receive what is more than an apology.

So to whom and those that it may concern, I have read that you demanded an apology, and I have taken some time to write to you, to America, to satan and his allies in the whole world about how I feel. On 09/11/13, I will release some Instructions that delivers my real message to you, to America, to satan and his people in the whole world. On this day, the Ruler who sent me will be glorified, for this day will mark the final days of satan and his allies, and their place in the world. On that day, after this day, I will send my peace to those who received the instructions with joy, for they are the ones who will understand that the end of satan and satan’s allies in the world is finally here, and these people are everywhere in your country, and in the whole world. On this day, after this day, it will be wise for everyone to remain indoors until all the Instructions are redelivered. On this day, after this day, I will carry out the orders that have been given to me by our Ruler. On this day, I will dissolve the American government, I will dissolve satan’s government and those of his allies in the holy and mighty Name of Him Who sent me. On this day, my friends will be the friends of this Ruler; my enemies will be the enemies of this Ruler. His friends will be my friends, and the enemies of this Ruler will be my enemies. And on this day, I and the chosen ones will give all the glory to the Ruler who sent me. To America, satan, and his allies, prepare your war machines, prepare your men and women of war, prepare your quick reactions forces, on this day, I will test them, and I will remind them that they are nothing, for I will bind them, shame them, and trample them underfoot. This is the end of America, satan, and his allies in the whole world.

“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, Jesus Christ, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life?”

Here are some questions for America, Israel, and those who have allied themselves with satan. How can a Baby descend from Heaven to be God? How can a Man be God? How can God come in the form of a Man, just to sacrifice Himself? How can God be crucified on the Cross? How can a Man rise from the dead, and ascend into Heaven? How can the King of the Jews be the King of the whole world? How can the King of the Jews be the Creator of Heaven and earth, and owner of all lives? What kind of belief and doctrine is this? On the days ahead, I will answer these questions for America, satan, and his allies. On this day, I will teach satan and his allies to fear, for Judgment Day is here, satan and his allies will be judged on the days ahead.

On the day that America, and those throughout the whole world whom satan has blinded receives the Instructions from the Ruler who sent me, and choose not to obey, this Son of God will not hear you on that day. To all Christians, the end is here, no longer will you worship on this mountain or on that mountain; the end is here, no longer follow this god that has blinded many in the world, no longer follow his people, but follow my God and your God, the Great Ruler who sent me, and you will live.

By the time that many receive the Instructions from our Ruler who sent me, it will already be too late for many, because many in the past failed to heed the Instructions of this Ruler. But on this day, after this day, many will still have time to follow the Instructions which are not new, but are a reminder.

I have noticed that you Americans, and those whom satan have blinded never take anything seriously, everything is always a joke. So I took the liberty, and I told some jokes, I made them very American-y and earthly, and many laughed; but I destroyed the joy that came from the jokes, and I made both who laughed and those who did not laugh extremely sorrowful, because I told them the truth which came from the Ruler who sent me. When I began the jokes, I did not foresee the end of the jokes. So after the truth was born, and the jokes were destroyed; I knocked on all hearts, and the truth touched all souls and all hearts. Whoever receives the Truth that is in the Instructions that will be released on this day, will receive life after the dark days ahead.

I call on all foreign troops to leave Middle East immediately. They must leave, and allow them to unite, and allow them to heal, allow them to find themselves again through peace in their only true God and Savior our Lord Jesus Christ who created us all and owns us all. Close the Guantanamo Prison, persecute or release these prisoners immediately that you are torturing every day; if you have proof that they have done wrong, if you wish to persecute them, do whatever pleases you. If you have no proof, release them immediately, and let our God Jesus Christ Who sees all and knows all be the Judge. Any nation that does not withdraw their troops from Middle East, and give them the chance to find themselves during this period will answer to the Ruler who sent me, they will be held accountable. This is the grace, so let no one have any excuse for why they failed to obey the Instructions. All oppressions must end, or face our Ruler’s wrath on His glorious day. On the day that the Instructions from our Ruler who sent me are released, all nations will have equal power to do as they will, but the Ruler who sent me will be watching to see who will fail to obey the Instructions. After this day, any nation and anyone who chose satan will be turned into hell.

The days are near in your World when the Ruler who sent me will enforce a No-Fly Zone on satan and all his allies in this land. On this day, the wrath that is far greater than “shock and awe” will be multiplied, and we will be declared and established on earth forever.

On the appointed day, after the annihilation of satan, this great Army will cross all boarders, and those who did not side with the Ruler of this great Army from this Country within you will regret having made themselves the enemy. satan’s weapons are deceits, foolishness, and nuclear weapons, but our great Army has always had a Weapon that is mightier, and this Weapon has been planted in many homes all across America, and above all, He is the One who called the world to be, and He owns all our lives. And on this day when the Word will go out, this great Army will unleash all the mighty weapons that were declared.

For years, America conquered nations, in her arrogance and madness; she called herself the freest nation in the world. You spread this satanic freedom to nations who are blind, and this false freedom further corrupted you and them. America is a nation that sells satan’s freedom, and she packages it in two brands, “evil” or “lesser evil.” Is satan not satan? Is one of satan’s weapon not divide and conquer? I know this for a fact, for satan used this weapon on me, and uses it on many of my people.

We were down, my members were divided, and my spirit was crushed, and satan quickly declared victory.  But satan did not know that our great Ruler did not give up on my members. Our great Ruler united us again, and gave us more power, a power that is greater than satan’s. Now I will be the one in the chair mocking satan, and tormenting satan’s people, just like they tormented me and my members in our dark days.

In the days ahead, satan and his forces will weep like they have never wept before. satan crushed me and my members, but we were not defeated, satan used all the weapons, nothing was off-limits, and satan exalted himself in ignorance. But our great Ruler rebuilt me, and in the days ahead, our great Army will enter all the strongholds controlled by satan, and they will destroy satan. And those who did not secure themselves in the Ruler of this great Army will not live to see the daylight ever again.

Hypocrites! You can put a man in space, but you cannot put your own House in order. Hypocrites! You can forecast wars, and their weather, but you failed to forecast your end in the world. Hypocrites! You tell the world to obey your laws, and fear you, but your laws and ways are highways to hell. So to those who will not obey the Instructions, because they want to show how ignorant they are; on this day after I ruin your appetites, and take away all your pleasant foods and drinks, and pour out satan’s wine from your House, there will be enough flesh and blood to fill you, and whoever willingly chooses not to eat this flesh and drink this blood will have his or her place made in hell. Do not wave your flags on high to show your patriotism, your flag is an abomination; your flag will be burned. Our great Army will only spare those who applied the shed blood on themselves as a sign of surrender, those who burned their flags, and pledged allegiance to the Ruler who rules Heaven and earth, to the Ruler who rules satan, and all the nations that allied themselves with satan.

In the days ahead, your constitution will also be burned, and will be replaced with a New Law, and all will obey and live according to the New Law. Those who obeyed the Instructions will be given freedom, but not the kind of freedom that satan gives; but your new freedom will be in the New Law, and you will be one with the Law, and those who disobeyed the Instructions that were given will be burned and tortured, more than the torture that satan used on my people. We will take Jerusalem, and we will make Jerusalem our capital, and Israel will obey the New Law. After the war, we will retake our land from satan’s son; and satan and son will be destroyed, forever.

The complacency of the fools that you trusted with your security has failed you, and will destroy you, and have already destroyed many, and will destroy many in the days ahead; especially the one in that Whitehouse who is filled satan’s spirit, and is his. But whoever listens to my Instructions will dwell safely, and will be secure, without fear of evil after the new Ruler takes over, and your constitution is burned together with those of your allies, and is replaced with the New Law, the New Law that will never be questioned, amended, or overruled. Everyone in this land will obey the Laws of this Ruler who is within you, and will be coming from this Country near you.

Your doctrines and policies that are devised from satan’s book has brought this day to you, and the whole world will share the days ahead with you, and this is just the beginning. Before your eyes, many great cities with their people will go down into the darkness beneath, and they will be like they never existed. On that day, you will look up, and you will only see blood and darkness, even the sun will refuse to shine for you, the moon will despise you, even your street lights will not give you lights, the stars will fall, and the powers of Heaven will be shaken, and then “shock and awe” will be upon us, and we will all mourn and weep, for Him who was slayed will reveal His glory to the world, and all will weep, and confess that He who conquered death is the only God of Heaven and earth.

To LAX Passengers:

To LAX passengers, you are in good Hands; you are all in the good Hands of our Lord our God our Creator Jesus Christ. I am not a person of terror. I do not work for satan, or his people. The evil one has nothing in me. You missing your flights should be the last thing on your minds at this time. The only Flight that matters will soon be taking off, and that is the flight that should worry you the most. Do not miss the only Flight that matters, for there will never be another Flight. I send my peace to you, your friends, and your families. Our Lord our God our Creator our Savior did not tell me to evacuate you people from the Airport, I did this part on my own. This is the only way for me to get the attention of the whole world, especially the so-called world leaders who think that they know what is best for us peasants; but in truth, they know nothing, and are nothing. I did not call for any threat. But knowing the foolishness of man, which they call wisdom in this world, with a funny name like mine, and being a Nigerian; by now the news media have probably come to the conclusion that I’m a terrorist, and then, they’ll spin their lies to get more viewers for their “brainwashing session,” and tell you to trust them, that they know it all. Not to be too harsh on the media, if I myself was on one of their channels that satan uses to bring us into captivity, and keep us in bondage, after I heard that I am a Nigerian with a funny name, I probably would’ve told all of you to go hide, dig a tunnel, call on the mountains to hide. But in the days which are near, whoever fails to obey the Commandments of our Lord our God Jesus Christ will be calling on those mountains to fall on them, and hide them, and will wish that they were never born. So like always, the media have judged wrong, they know nothing, and are nothing. I delivered a message saying that I will be delivering a message to America, and the whole world, that I will be using the authority given to me, and this is the part of the message. I don’t have an Africa square in America where I can yell for everyone to gather for my message, so I can tell them what our Lord Jesus Christ our God has done for me, and now wants to do for all of you who are lost in this world that satan and his forces stole from us. Even if I had a square, no one will pay attention to a crazy African with a Cross, yelling out repent, the Kingdom of our Lord our God our Creator Jesus Christ is at hand, so this is the best square I came up with. Tonight, regardless of yours sins, you are children of our Lord our God our Creator, and that makes all of you my brothers and sisters, mothers and fathers, and I love you all with the love our Lord our God in me; let’s work together to keep it this way, for after this day, whoever fails to obey the Commandments of our Lord our God our Creator Jesus Christ will be my enemy, just like satan is my enemy. I have seen our Lord our God our Creator Jesus Christ; the One and only One Who created us, and owns us. For the sake of your souls, end all sins immediately, confess your only God and Savior, get baptized, and receive the Holy Spirit. Get on your knees. Remain on your knees, for we no longer have time in this world to hate and fight each other. What happened today will be brought up on Judgment Day, and I hope in our God that you will be among His people rejoicing, as we watch satan and his people be cast into the bottomless pit, Amen. Also, to the Airline industry, do not take out your frustration on the kind passengers. Please do not charge Christian passengers with Bible fee, Cross fee, or Believer’s fee. And please do not join satan’s forces tomorrow to begin profiling who might be a potential Christian passenger, a Bible Carrier, or a Cross carrier. The earth is the Lord’s and all its fullness, that means you and I own nothing in this world. The Airline industry is probably more concerned about making more money than they are concerned about spending eternity in hell. I’m sure that tomorrow, you and your buddies at Wall Street will be grieving about how many trillions of dollars that you lost. Keep on piling up all those earthly wealth that is worth nothing to our Lord our God; soon, our Lord our God our Creator Jesus Christ will burn all the wealth of the world, including your trillions of dollars and my change.

To Al Qaeda:

To Al Qaeda and all the terror groups in the whole world, I have seen and know your god that you kill for, and he is not the LIVING GOD Who is our LORD our GOD JESUS CHRIST. Your god is satan, and in the days ahead, our GOD; the only LIVING GOD Who owns your life and breath will bring down His Wrath upon you all and your god, and I will be there on Judgment Day to bear witness against you and those who ignored this warning. End all violence and wickedness now! Apply the Precious Blood that was shed for us, seek mercy from my GOD, and your GOD, our only LIVING GOD and SAVIOR, the One and only Creator of Heaven and earth Who owns everything that is in them; the One Who conquered death, and lives forevermore. He is the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End, Who is and was and is to come, the Almighty, Who is our only LORD and our GOD and SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST, Who is the only GOD Who has the power to save and to destroy, and make all things new. Release all your prisoners, those that you are persecuting and torturing in the name of our God Jesus Christ.

To Syria:

Bashar al-Assad, in the name our Lord our God Jesus Christ Who created you and I, by the authority given to me, I call on you to immediately end the bloodshed. Unite your people, and avoid the wrath you have heaped on your head, and keep on heaping on your head. Fearfully remove yourself from the power which you don’t have, and immediately get on your knees, remain on your knees, and weep for mercy. If you fail to obey, and continue to obey the sons of satan from Russia and China, I will be there on Judgment Day ahead to bear witness against you and them. Our Lord Jesus Christ our God our Creator and only Savior Who owns us all has again called on the whole world to end all sins, confess Him, and obey Him. Unite your nation under Him, apply His Precious Blood, and by His lovingkindness and tender mercies which He shows to me every day; He will save you and your people from the hell that satan is bringing to our soon-to-pass world. Whoever disobeys my message will answer to our Lord Jesus Christ our God Who sent me in the days which are near. Leave Syria immediately, and allow them to unite, and find themselves through peace in our Lord Jesus Christ our God and our Creator, the only God and Savior of Heaven and earth. Those who oppose you and those who support you are not to disobey the Commandments of our Lord our God Jesus Christ.

To All Nations:

No apologies to all nations, satan and his forces. There will not be a second arrest; our Lord our God our Creator Jesus Christ will be the One making the arrest this time. And He will be locking up the offenders in His Jail. Where? In hell. There, the worm does not die, and the fire burns forever. So to all nations, let there be no confusion whatsoever, this letter is for all nations in the whole world. To all the nations and world leaders, that includes United States, Russia, China, Iran, Egypt, North Korea, Japan, South Korea, France, Germany, Italy, Pakistan, India, United Kingdom; this letter is also for you and your successors; fear, tremble exceedingly, my eyes have seen our Creator, our LORD our GOD JESUS CHRIST, the Consuming Fire, the One and only One Who formed us, and owns our breath is coming to judge us. His great Army, the Army above all armies, His Fiery Angels are coming to destroy His enemies; those who refused to declare Him, and continued to oppress and kill His children, those who continued to keep their people from knowing their only true God and only Savior. Tremble exceedingly, your lease on the land has expired; the Owner of the land is coming back to take His land. Our LORD our GOD our SAVIOR is not coming back to be crucified again; the Mighty King is coming back to take His people Home, and His Mighty Army will destroy, and burn the chaff, those who refused to obey Him and worship Him. Prepare your world court, fill up your armories, prepare your generals, and prepare your special forces, in the days ahead, His Mighty Army will bring them down to hades; those who refused to lay down their weapons and carry their Cross will be turned into refuse, into nothing. I have seen, and know your ruler, satan; the man of dishonor and unrighteousness, the one who corrupts you and the world that was leased to us; he is trembling exceedingly, for he knows that his final days are finally here, and his son is coming to help you enforce more oppression and killings. Choose your Maker our Lord our GOD our SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST, the Most High, receive mercy and eternal life. In the Holy Name of our Lord our God Jesus Christ, this is His amazing grace revealed to us again, obey Him, or perish on the day of His Wrath. If you choose His enemy, and continue to plot with satan against His people, you and the enemy will be turned into hell. Now is the time for all the leaders of the world to pick a side. Good or evil? The choice is yours, and the fiery Judgment belongs to our Lord our God our Creator Jesus Christ. Any leader or anyone who wills not to repent, but chooses satan after this day will have his or her place secured in hell. Starting tomorrow, any leader who addresses his nation and his people is to confess the Holy and Mighty Name of our Lord our God our Creator our Savior. And His Name is Jesus Christ, and no other name. Our Lord our God Jesus Christ already knows your hearts and minds. But your people, those that you so-called world leaders are leading to hell will be the one bearing witness against you. All your values are to match all the values of our Lord our God our Creator our Savior Jesus Christ, and we must obey His Commandments. Rejoice, or fear and tremble exceedingly, all glory, all power, all honor, all authority, all dominion, forever belongs to our Lord our God our Creator and the only King of Heaven and earth, the One and Only One Who conquered death, and His Holy and Mighty Name is Jesus Christ.

To satan:

Isaiah 14, “How the oppressor has ceased, the golden city ceased! The staff of the wicked has been broken. The scepter of the rulers; he who struck the people in wrath with a continual stroke, he who ruled the nations in anger, is persecuted and no one hinders. The whole earth is at rest and quiet; they break forth into singing. Indeed the cypress trees rejoice over you, and the cedars of Lebanon, saying, since you were cut down, no woodsman has come up against us. Hell from beneath is excited about you, to meet you at your coming; it stirs up the dead for you, all the chief ones of the earth; it has raised up from their thrones all the kings of the nations. They all shall speak and say to you: Have you also become as weak as we? Have you become like us? Your pomp is brought down to she’ol, and the sound of your stringed instruments; the maggot is spread under you, and worms cover you. How you are cut down to the ground, you who weakened nations! lucifer, son of nothing! How you are cut down to the ground, you who weakened the nations! For you have said in your heart: ‘i will ascend into heaven, i will exalt my throne above the stars of God; i will also sit on the mount of the congregation on the farthest sides of the north; i will ascend above the heights of the clouds, i will be like the Most High.’ Yet you shall be brought down to She’ol, to the lowest depths of the pit.”

Why do satan and his allies plot a vain thing? The evil and his kings set themselves, and his rulers take counsel together, against our great Ruler, saying, “Let us break their bonds in pieces and cast their cords from us.” Our great Ruler shall laugh, but will hold them in derision. Then He will speak to them in His wrath, and distress them in His deep displeasure.

Now therefore, be wise all you leaders of the world; be instructed, you judges of the earth. Serve the Lord our God Jesus Christ with fear, or perish on the day of His wrath. Blessed are all those who put their trust in Him.

No army will match the Army that is coming from this Country that is near you to execute judgment on satan and his allies. Tremble exceedingly, for the Ruler who sent me lives forevermore, obey the Instructions, or perish on the day of His wrath. Pray for Jerusalem. Pray for Jerusalem. Pray for Jerusalem. Pray for Jerusalem. Jerusalem will need our prayers to be able to bear the days ahead. O Jerusalem, you failed to rule this world, and made America your god. O Jerusalem, know that from the going forth of this Command, your desolation is near, no longer will anyone say that those days are far-off, for the ruler of your dark days is here, in your midst, I have seen him. O Jerusalem, your King and my King Who is the King of Heaven and earth loves you more than you can never begin to imagine, you are all His special treasure, call upon His Name, believe in His name, He will hear you, you are His people, and I have seen how much He loves you. Pray for Jerusalem. O Israel, you failed to rule us, our God gave you this world, all nations were supposed to learn from you, and follow you. Do not fear, I have seen your King; the King of Heaven and earth will return, and He will execute judgment on your enemies, beginning from satan and his son, the beast; the man of perdition and all their forces. In the Holy Name of my God and your God Who is our Lord Jesus Christ the One and only Righteous King, I bless you and your children, may our God send his abundant peace upon you and those who will call upon His Name in these final days. Blessed is our God Jesus Christ Who is coming back to our world to execute His fiery Judgment, and destroy His enemies.

NEMAELINEBGMNAELINEBGMTSIARKSUSIJIYAEREKEYNOANIYAATUPOZNEYNOANIYAEWNEYNOEKNBUELINOTUTOAWUANEWGIULEIDNEZEIYAEZEANUHAMAYNAOZOAIBAGLEARSIIDNEZEELINAWUIDNATUPOZNEYNOUBTSIARKSUSIJINANNEMAELINAWUIDNANELINOSNIDNEREYIDLEARSIIDNEZEIYAEWNEYNOARAMAAKUSNEWKEELEIREMEEWGIULEANNUMEREYNIYAANNEHGUPKNARASABGEHIAKAMUBUNEMENELINEHIIZOEYNOUMUWAIBEMMEYNOMUHUWAALUBOEYNOALUTAOJUELINAWUIRIDODUMMADIEKENIHCELINEBGMELINEBGMAMMIDEKENIHC

NEMAELINEBGMANELINEGBMTSIARKSUSIJIYAEREKEYNOANIYAATUPOZNEYNOANIYAEWNEYNOEKNBUELINOTUTOAWUANEWGIULEIDNEZEIYAEZEANUHAMAYNAOZOAIBAGLEARSIIDNEZEELINAWUIDNATUPOZNEYNOUBTSIARKSUSIJINANNEMAELINAWUIDNANELINOSNIDNEREYIDLEARSIIDNEZEIYAEWNEYNOARAMAAKUSNEWKEELEIREMEEWGIULEANNUMEREYNIYAANNEHGUPKNARASABGEHIAKAMUBUNEMENELINEHIIZOEYNOUMUWAIBEMMEYNOMUHUWAALUBOEYNOALUTAOJUELINAWUIRIDODUMMADIEKENIHCELINEBGMELINEBGMAMMIDEKENIHC

Language in Igbo(Nigeria)

.NEMA, ELIN EBGM NA, ELIN MGBE ,TSIARK SUSIJ IYA-EREK-EYNO AN IYA-ATUPOZN-EYNO AN IYA-EWN-EYNO EKN BU ELIN OTUTO .AWU AN EWGIULE IDN EZE ,IYA-EZE ANUHA MAYNA .OZO AIBAG LEARSI IDN EZE .ELIN AWU IDN ATUPOZN-EYNO UB TSIARK SUSIJ INAN .NEMA ,ELIN AWU IDN AN ELIN OSN IDN EREYID LEARSI IDN EZE ,IYA-EWN-EYNO ARAMA AK .USNEWKE ELEIREME EWGIULE-ANN ,UMEREYN IYA-ANN EHGUPKN ARASABG EHI AKAMUB UNEMEN ELINEHI .IZO EYNO UMUWA .IBEMM EYNO MUHUWA ALUBOEYNO ALUTA OJU .ELIN AWU IRID ODU .AMM ID EKENIHC ELINEBGM. ELINEBGM, AMM ID EKENIHC

CHINEKE DI MMA, MGBENILE. MGBENILE, CHINKE DI MMA. UDO DIRI UWA NILE. UJO ATULA ONYEOBULA, AWUHUM ONYE MMEBI. AWUMU ONYE OZI. IHENILE NEMENU BUMAKA IHE GBASARA NKPUGHE NNA-AYI NYEREMU. NNA-ELUIGWE EMERIELE EKWENSU. KA AMARA ONYE-NEW-AYI, EZE NDI ISRAEL DIYERE NDI NSO NILE NA NDI UWA NILE, AMEN. NANI JISUS KRAIST BU ONYE-NZOPUTA NDI UWA NILE. EZE NDI ISRAEL GABIA OZO. ANYAM AHUNA EZE-AYI, EZE NDI ELUIGWE NA UWA. OTUTO NILE BU NKE ONYE-NWE-AYI NA ONYE-NZOPUTA-AYI NA ONYE-KERE-AYI, JISUS KRAIST, MGBE NILE, NA MGBE NILE, AMEN.

God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good. Peace be unto the world. Let no one fear, I am not a person of terror. I am a messenger. All that is happening, concerns the Revelations that our Father gave me. Our Heavenly Father conquered satan. May the grace of our Owner, the King of Israel be unto all the holy people, and to the whole world, Amen. Only Jesus Christ is the Savior of the whole world. The King of Israel will come again. My eyes have seen our King, the King of Heaven and earth. All glory belongs to our Owner, and our Savior, and our Creator, Jesus Christ, forever and ever, Amen.

nna alpha onuoha.

TheendofsatanRepent

LordJesusConquered

Songs of the Night:

Christ is Risen – Matt Maher

Here For You – Matt Redman

10,000 Reasons (Bless The Lord) – Matt Redman

You Alone Can Rescue – Matt Redman

Where Would We Be – Matt Redman

Endless Hallelujah – Matt Redman

We Could Change The World – Matt Redman

Hosanna – Hillsong United

I Will Follow – Chris Tomlin

God Of This City – Chris Tomlin

Hail To The King – Don Moen

Thank God I’m Free – Don Moen

O God Of Abraham – Don Moen

Savior King – Don Moen

Mighty To Save – Don Moen

Divine Exchange – Don Moen

He loves You – Don Moen

Thank God I’m Free – Don Moen

Thank You Jesus – Don Moen

Burn – Don Moen

Savior King – Don Moen

In Jesus’ Name – Darlene Zschech

Victor’s Crown – Darlene Zschech

Majesty – Ron Kenoly

We Declare That The Kingdom of God Is Here – Ron Kenoly

Glory Be To Jesus (satan Has Fallen) – Ron Kenoly

The King of kings Is Coming – Ron Kenoly

Return To Righteousness America – Ron Kenoly

In Righteousness You Reign – Ron Kenoly

Highest Place – Ron Kenoly

We Shall Behold Him – Ron Kenoly

TheendofsatanRepent

LordJesusConquered

 

The TSA Cover Up Scandal, Part II

The girl, again

And we’re back. Back in June we had the TSA Cover Up Scandal, in which I predicted, incorrectly, that the TSA screener at LAX who told Mark Frauenfelder’s 15-year-old daughter to “cover up” on account of her clothing would be terminated. I also incorrectly predicted that a TSA spokesperson would come out and comment on the affair. However, one part of my June post was 100% accurate:

“I believe that this was likely a case of a somewhat mentally unstable TSA screener who decided to get all Taliban on the girl.”

It turns out the man at the heart of the Cover Up Scandal is named Nna Alpha Onuoha, a 29-year-old ex-TSA screener (finally) who was employed with the TSA for 7 years. He very quickly graduated from slut shaming to terror-raining. The TSA (owing, no doubt, to the cumbersome bureaucratic red tape that makes it difficult for any TSA employee to be fired after they have passed their 2-year probationary period) was unable to terminate Onuoha back in June, despite the fact that Onuoha proved himself to be an unstable and questionable character on the global scale, when news of his offhanded request to a 15-year-old-girl made news around the world. He was only suspended. But apparently, Onuoha ended up doing the TSA’s job for them by offering his resignation, and then did the terrorists’ job for them, by offering terror, former-TSA style.

Turns out Onuoha wrote a letter to the 15-year-old-girl’s father just a couple of months after the slut shaming incident, which said, among other things:

“Do not expect another 9/11. What will unfold on this day and on the days ahead will be greater than 9/11.”

Never forget, indeed! Hmm. The above statement sounds vaguely familiar, somehow. Wait a minute. Isn’t that the sort of thing that the TSA is supposed to be saving us from?

And then, just last Tuesday, he caused parts of LAX to be shut down by phoning in bomb threats:

“A man believed to be Onuoha made two phone calls to TSA saying certain airport terminals should be evacuated. During one call, the man told an employee he would ‘be watching’ to see if authorities evacuated the terminals as instructed.”

Read the story here. Now would probably be a good time to throw in your two cents, TSA spokespeople. I’ll be back with more on this soon.

Updates Coming in About a Week

We’re going to get this party started again fairly soon.

Recent Speculation About New Risks of Death-by-Terrorist-Attack Prompts Speculation About Death-by-Speculation

 

The recent, widely publicized U.S. terror intelligence — which, among other things, speculated upon two new methods by which to potentially be killed by Al-Qaeda on an airplane, including a “Clothes Bomber” and “Frankenbomber” — has led to further speculation about the possibility of death being caused by the speculation itself.

“Heck, I don’t know if me or my family are going to be killed by an Un-American Apparel Bomber or Frankenbomber,” said William Bledsoe of Tullahoma, Tennessee, “But I do know that I laughed so danged hard when I heard that radio announcement that I nearly drove my truck off the road.”

Mr. Bledsoe, safely resting after hearing the warning about a possible Un-American Apparel Bomber.

Amid the flurry of satirical commentary on Twitter under the hashtags #Un-AmericanApparelBomber and #Frankenbomber have come very real concerns that such announcements by U.S. intelligence officials may be causing Americans to become distracted while partaking of actual, everyday dangerous activities, such as eating, walking, and pulling out of their driveways.

“I would say that last week’s announcement of intelligence on a potential Fashionbomber and Frankenbomber caused at least 3-6 people to veer off the road and die horrible deaths,” said David Milbrook, president of the American Traffic Safety Services Association.

29-year-old Amy Yu of Portland, Oregon claims that the ABC News recap of the possibility of a future Frankenbomber nearly led to her demise.

“My boyfriend and I were enjoying a nice dinner of braised balsamic chicken when the news report came on ABC News, about the terrorists who may be out there planning to dip their clothes in liquid explosives and let them dry, turning their outfits into fashion bombs and all. When the part about the possibility of a ‘Frankenbomber’ with a surgically-implanted bomb destroying an airplane came on, my boyfriend got up from the table and started doing a Frankenstein imitation, arms out, sort of stumbling around the living room.”

A possible depiction of a homegrown Frankenbomber

“He was all, ‘Urrgh, urrgh, look at me, I’m Khalid-Mohammed al-Frankenbomber, I’m going to kill you the next time you fly on an airplane, Amy.’ He looked really ridiculous, and it was funny, because you know, it’s not like I’m ever actually going to be killed by a Frankenbomber. But it made me laugh so hard that I choked on a piece of chicken, which almost did kill me. Luckily, my boyfriend knows the Heimlich maneuver,” said Yu.

The dish that was allegedly rendered deadly by U.S. intelligence

“Braised balsamic chicken is supposed to be really healthful, but when you add U.S. intelligence to it, it can turn into death chicken,” added Yu. “I just think people need to be aware of that.”

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A Black Woman’s Hair Becomes Target in TSA’s Security Theater

[Originally published August 10, 2013]

OK, so the original title of the story is “Black Women’s Hair Becomes Target of TSA’s Security Theater,” but I couldn’t find it within myself to reproduce that level of sensationalism. In short, MSNBC host and author Melissa Harris-Perry has discovered that the full body scanners put bounding boxes on her braids every time she goes through, necessitating an idiotic TSA “resolution inspection” of her braids. It’s not just black women’s braids that cause this; the shitty L3 scanners cause everyone with braids or similarly dense hairdos to receive such an inspection. Actually, the L3 scanners show head-area anomalies on about 1 out of every 8 passengers, for various mysterious reasons.

As a TSA screener, this was one of the things I hated most when working the body scanners. Inspections such as the hairdo check usually represent the quintessential example of security theater at the TSA in this, the current Body Scanner Era. Watch a TSA agent resolve a hairdo alarm, and you’ll see a hell of a piece of security theater in action, almost every time. What the agent will usually do is put on a show of looking at the passenger’s head from all angles (knowing that his or her supervisor may be watching, and that the performance is on-camera) maybe do a little theatrical pat-down of the hairdo, and then let the passenger go his or her way.

The ridiculous part of all this is that the hair is usually either A) Obviously just a case of braided or accessorized hair that anyone can instantly see is not concealing anything, and doesn’t actually require any more attention than a glance or B) A nearly impenetrable fortress of an elaborate hairdo that could not actually be cleared of containing a threat short of asking the passenger to pull apart the hairdo on the checkpoint.

An example of the above Type A hairdo is this:

Exhibit A

An example of the Type B hairdo is this:

Exhibit B. She’s taken. Sorry, guys.

Women on their way to or coming back from weddings or fancy events are the most common cases of hairdos that trigger an anomaly on the scanner that can’t actually be cleared of containing a threat, short of asking the woman to pull the hairdo apart. But the majority of TSA screeners want to avoid the appearance of being total assholes whenever possible, believe it or not, dear passengers, and so restrict themselves to putting on a little security theater show of looking at the hairdo with great concentration (presumably with Superman x-ray vision that trumps the full body scanner’s shitty x-ray vision) and then doing a gentle blue-gloved massage of the hair.

For a reasonable TSA screener working with an idiot of a TSA screener on the full body scanner, the most frustrating thing is when encountering the A type hair style– a case of hair that doesn’t even warrant more than a quick look. Watch the two TSA screeners working the full body scanners, and you may see one of them actually take a full 30 seconds to peer deeply into the mysterious, impenetrable abyss of potential smuggled terror that is this:

“Is there a gun in there? A tool kit? A stick of dynamite? What does that clever lil’ terrorist think she’s trying to get past this here full body scanner?” TSA Officer Fife, High Sheriff of Jackass City will think, wasting 30 seconds of everyone’s life by pausing the whole full body scanner operation to investigate the situation. (Sometimes, in all fairness, it’s a case of a recently hired TSA screener who doesn’t know any better, or who is scared that one of the idiotic managers or supervisors that he or she has to deal with is hovering nearby or watching the checkpoint on remote camera, waiting to write a screener up for not dancing a little theatrical routine around a girl such as the one in the above picture.)

The worst thing for a TSA screener who tries to use common sense is that some of the mentally challenged TSA screeners out there will actually run to the supervisor’s podium and lobby to get a screener written up for daring to let Little Miss Exhibit A pass without a serious looking-over and scalp massage. When this happens, a climate of fear reigns over the full body scanner operation, everything slows down, and the lines get longer, as even the TSA screeners who try to use common sense are dragged into putting on elaborate security theater shows, for the satisfaction of the lowest common denominator

But wait, there’s more. (I apologize, dear passengers, but working the full body scanner with an idiot of a co-worker was one of the things I hated most about working at the TSA toward the end of my time there. No, actually, it was the number one thing I hated about it.)

The absolute, number one, most idiotic example of security theater that anyone, absolutely anyone, can witness at nearly any time at a TSA checkpoint’s full body scanner is this: when a TSA screener investigates a passenger’s watch after the full body scanner indicated an anomaly on the passenger’s wrist. Want to know why it’s idiotic? Sure, I’ll tell you.

The best theoretical reason they’re fondling your watch is due to the possibility that it might be modified for use as a timer in an IED. Fair enough, I guess, sort of: Ramzi Yousef tried that in 1994 on PA Flight 434. So TSA screeners invariably put on a little show of sort of peeking under the watch when you come through the scanner, to make sure there’s no terror under there, and then, satisfied that your watch is terror-free, let you continue on as clear. But do you know what the one thing that the average Joe Shmoe airplane-obsessed terrorist isn’t going to need? That’s right, a timer. Want to know why? Because HIS FUCKING THUMB-AND-MENTAL-COUNTDOWN-TO-ETERNAL-MARTYRED-GLORY IS GOING TO BE THE TIMER.

And do you know what the one thing that a brilliant terrorist who figured out a way to use the watch that he’s wearing to double as a timer on an airplane-planted IED is going to have? A plain-looking watch that’s either imperceptibly modified, or that he’ll modify after passing through security. So do you know what you just cheerfully and confidently let pass through security with your diligent, theatrical, by-the-book inspection of a passenger’s watch, TSA screener Barney Fife? One of the components of a brilliant terrorist’s IED, because IT’S A FUCKING DIGITAL WATCH; IT CAN ONLY EVER BE SO “CLEAR” IN THE POWER SUPPLY+ INITIATOR+ EXPLOSIVES+ SWITCH/TIMER= AN IED EQUATION.

—-

To close out Kip Hawley week: As a fomer TSA employee, I can emphatically say that Hawley and the New York Times were definitely right about one thing: “TSA officers need to be encouraged to think on their own, not disciplined for it.”

—-

If you’re on Twitter, so am I.

Related TSA articles from my archives:

“I’ve Been a Current TSA Employee, Not a Former TSA Employee, All Along.”

“The Most Awkward Moment for a TSA Screener.”

“No, You Don’t Know What It Is”

Lisa Simeone on HuffPo Live Talking to Kip Hawley

It’s Kip Hawley week here at Taking Sense Away, apparently.

Most of this blog’s readers cross over to the TSA News Blog (the TSA News Blog was the first publication to link to this site, thanks to Lisa Simeone stumbling upon the Insider’s TSA Dictionary) and have already seen this, anyway, but for those who haven’t, it’s some good TSA panel action, with Kip Hawley, Lisa Simeone, and Khaliah Bharnes of the Electronic Information Privacy Center, discussing the TSA’s VIPR teams.

For whatever reason, Hawley can’t find it within himself to admit that the VIPR teams are just as silly as all the other TSA security measures that he has been publicly criticizing since he began promoting Permanent Emergency. The VIPR teams (traveling security theater units that deal with trains and public events, on top of airports, see the Insider’s TSA Dictionary) are enormous wastes of money, and have been discounted by various cost/benefit analysts. In fact, I’m pretty sure that I’ve already written about how silly the VIPR teams are on this blog, at least once.

In short, some of the best independent risk-assessment experts to have taken on airport security (such as Mark G. Stewart)  have put forth a very good case that some measure of security theater may be worth society’s trouble in airports, given the bottle-neck nature of an airport’s traffic flow, and the somewhat unique risk scenario that airplanes present. This is due to the fact that, because a plane’s cabin is pressurized, and that it travels 30,000 feet in the sky, a quantity of explosives that would only kill a couple people on the ground can take out 300 people on an airborne plane, and in uniquely spectacular fashion. Add to this the anxiety that people generally feel when embarking on a trip that will involve soaring thousands of feet in the sky, and it may be that a slight measure of security theater is justifiable at airports, in terms of the collective psyche. The key word there is slight.

However, when looking at the trains or large public gatherings that the VIPR teams proclaim to protect, we see very few of the factors that make even that slight measure of security theater worthwhile at airports. There are only 500 or so airports in the U.S. that deal with large commercial airlines, making it possible for a somewhat consistent security presence to be stationed at every one of those hubs. But how many train and subway stations are there? How many bus stations? How many crowded public areas? It would be impossible to project even the image of control over all possible points of entry for all possible public areas, as the VIPR teams are essentially trying to do, short of a full lockdown on the populace. Better to let people keep the tax dollars and spare them the further compromise of civil liberties, and just leave trains and public gatherings to the local law enforcement entities and emergency responders who inevitably end up handling the unpredictable, one-in-a-billion terrorist crime by themselves, anyway, alongside the millions of other daily crimes and accidents that are actually worth worrying about.

The reason that this VIPR thing suddenly flared up in the news again is because the New York Times ran a story on it, and the New York Times is numero uno in the news food chain; if the Grey Lady deigns to touch upon a topic, then we all have to go over it again, one more time.

For me, the highlight of the panel is at 20: 54, when Kip Hawley claims that the TSA’s VIPR program is useful, and that the “TSA is respected within the intelligence community for its VIPR program.” Lisa laughs at this point–one of several points of the panel discussion in which she laughs at Hawley– and Kip definitely deserves it. Again, I knew a few people who went from TSA to the FBI, and who told me, after they showed up back at my airport’s exit lane with FBI credentials– necessitating the usual CSS call over the radio to escort them through– that once they went from the TSA to the FBI they tried to do their best to hide their former employee from their new FBI friends, due to the fact that they’d be mercilessly taunted for being former TSA. The TSA is the least respected branch of the Department of Homeland Security, and the Department of Homeland Security itself is one of the many agencies (save for the FBI and CIA) that has to go whining and groveling at the NSA’s feet for access to information, as this New York Times article from Sunday revealed. The VIPR teams being “highly respected by the intelligence community” is, indeed, laughable.

—-

Permanent Emergency: The Movie– Storyboard, Scene 1

In this scene from my proposed film adaptation of former TSA administrator Kip Hawley’s book “Permanent Emergency: Inside the TSA,” we see one of the historic 2002 meetings that put our 200-million-dollar-per-arrest post-9/11 Federal Air Marshals on airplanes.

We’re starting off small here, just a 30-second clip. It may turn out that the public isn’t even ready for this badass, state-of-the-art, edge-of-your-seat political thriller, so I think it’s best to just sort of ease into this.

On the right is Department of Transportation brass Michael Jackson (yes, that is actually his name; 1/3 of Permanent Emergency involves a guy named Michael Jackson running around barking orders), and on the left is a Secret Service agent named Tom who just happened to be in the room at the time when Michael Jackson decided to fire Michael Pankow, the then-director of the FAM program.

(Michael Jackson fires FAM chief Pankow because Pankow is working too slowly in getting armed plainclothes FAMS on airplanes across the U.S., and then just gives the job to Secret Service agent Tom on the spot, due to the fact that he was in Jackson’s office at the time.)

I stayed almost 100 percent faithful to the dialog from the book. Click here for this high-tech thrill ride.

Former TSA Head Criticizing TSA Again on CNN.com

Hawley shares my opinion on a few points.

I’m sure Hawley’s been preparing to make some kind of power play for government office or for a spot as CEO at some security consulting firm, hence the publicity, but hey, whatever. His message just so happens to contain some good points.