Monthly Archives: December 2012

Letter From a Passenger: I Am the Kobe Bryant of the TSA.

Dear Taking Sense Away, Like many of your correspondents, I too travel this great land of ours by air on a weekly basis, trying to eke out a living in these austere times in the commercial sector. While I have … Continue reading

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Mail Bag Monday is Coming.

On Monday, I’m going to start publishing dozens of the letters I’ve received, continuing throughout the month of January. At the end of January, we’re updating the Insider’s TSA Dictionary, so get those entries in. The Insider’s TSA Dictionary was … Continue reading

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Confession #5: “I Think We All Know What a Crotch Looks Like. Now Let’s Get Out There, and Perform”: Inside Radiation Scanner Training

“The beauty of an airport is in the splendor of wide open spaces. An airport should be naked.” -The architect Le Corbusier, 1930, on the future of airport design. It’s early 2010 and I’m slumped in a seat in a … Continue reading

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Letter From a TSA Officer: “I Came Here to Chew Bubblegum and Kick Terrorism’s Ass, and I’m All Out of Bubblegum, Because My Transportation Security Administration Supervisor Ordered Me to Spit it Out.”

I Came Here to Chew Bubblegum and Kick Terrorism’s Ass, and I’m All Out of Bubblegum, Because I Was Ordered to Spit the Bubblegum Out, Because the Terrorists Are at this Airport Right Now Looking for Signs of Weakness Such … Continue reading

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I Have Over 150 Letters from Passengers and Screeners In My Inbox. From Yesterday Alone.

I am trying to respond to all of them as fast as I can. I appreciate all the kind words and interesting stories. But I think the best thing I can do at this point is to try to arrange … Continue reading

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Letter From a Passenger: “How Do TSA Employees Feel About Working For a Despised Agency?”

This one comes from Rod. “Would you know if the TSA higher-ups acknowledge the outcry against the agency and how they are attempting to handle said outcry? And are the screeners themselves aware, and how are they attempting to handle … Continue reading

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Letter From a Passenger: “What Really Happens in the TSA Private Room?”

GFTB asks: “Tell us, please, what really happens in that private room and why the TSA does not want it seen in public nor recorded.” Dear GFTB, I can only speak from my personal experience on this blog, as well … Continue reading

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Confession #4 : In Memory of Snow Globes Lost (and of All the Idiotic TSA Rules I Refused to Follow)

(img) It’s holiday season, dear passengers, and for once, recently, the TSA gave you what is hands down the most heart-warming gift I have ever seen it hand out, though you may not have noticed: as of this last September, … Continue reading

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Plots We Imagine the TSA Protected Us From Today: The iPad Plot.

PLOT #1: THE iPAD PLOT. Details of Plot Sent in by: A. Terrorist Dear TSA, As-salamu alaykum. I don’t believe any further introduction is necessary, but just in case you’re not in razor-sharp airport security form today: I am, quite … Continue reading

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Hate Mail, Part 1: Wherein I Am Called a Traitor.

Well, it’s happened. I got my first piece of hate mail the other day. Actually, my second, but the first was nearly unintelligible. This is the first coherent piece of hate mail, sent by an anonymous person, who I think … Continue reading

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